疲倦。。

呃。。今天还真是疲惫的一天。。 距离要上的班机还有短短两个小时，行李却还没有真正的整理完毕。。 头疼，爱睡等等让我超级懒得去动我的行李。。

今早搭巴士去看中医，医师说我筋骨不够力，需要靠配好的中药来调理。。希望腰酸可以快点好起来，不然工作上就会很辛苦。。

想到回去后明晚开始两天晚班，休息一天然后二号开始到五号连续工作。。累！:(

希望自己在中秋节能回家一趟，让妈妈开心一下~ :)


咪，我开始想你了。。。。   [泪]

迟来的回复。。

这次回家两个礼拜，打从第一天放假开始心里就有着莫名的困扰。。 是困扰吗？我不懂该如何表达这种心情。两个礼拜，每个人都说：“这么长的假？不闷吗？”。老实说，不闷。。可心里就一直想着最后一天假期，又要飞回工作岗位的心情。。好不舍。。 。好想就呆在家里，陪家人多一点。。我不否认，很多次了都有种冲动想回到古晋工作，但理智点过后又觉得要离开也不是这个时候。。工作上认识了很多可爱又搞笑的同事朋友们，再加上自己也喜欢这份工作 —— 又另外一种的不舍。。。很多同事都辞职了，难道我也会和他们一样等到哪一天对工作开始厌倦了才辞职？

我不知道。。。

也是会是哪一天我想永远陪在家人的身边时候，我才辞职？

我也不知道。。。


明天就要飞了，没剩下多少的时间，今天都在收拾家里东西，顺便收拾要带回KL的东西。。刚才我为了要找回中学时期用的水彩盘，我翻开了被我妈妈收在床底下的盒子。那个盒子是我妈在我到大学读书时期帮我收拾的。可以说我妈是把房间里所有属于我的东西都收在里面吧？呵呵。

无意间我找到很多纸张、信、卡片等。很用心的，我一张一张地读，不错过每一个字。也许当年的我没有这么用心吧，伤害了很多身边的人。不，是我关心的人，也是默默关心着我的人。。很多很多当年的事情我都忘了。。不是我不想记得，不是我没有真心对待，但我就是忘了。。

读着其中一封信，我好气恼。。但我想当年，我应该没有回信吧？信里的你已经没有让我回信的余地，那 —— 是一封离别的信。。就算当年回信也并不会带来任何的改变，因为你是那么的坚持，坚持地相信你心里的感受。。

朋友，信里你说我们曾经结为姐妹。。 其实这件事我忘了。。我很抱歉对很多事情我都没有那么用心，这么重要的东西我忘了，对不起。。现在我依然对那件事情没有任何印象。。信里的你很气愤我对你的忽冷忽热，质疑你在我心里的分量。。我读着读着，我哭了。。 当年的我真的那么疏忽你，无意的伤害你吗？那你怎么不问问我究竟又有多在乎你呢？信里你质疑当年我其中一封信里的一句话，说那很假。。 其实我忘了当年我在看这封信时的感受了，但我现在是感到有点儿气愤。。 那句话，也是我鼓起了勇气才跟你坦白的，不是假意。。当年我也有质疑自己在你心中的分量，妒嫉你身边的朋友，妒嫉你可以很自然地和他们聊心事，而我却不知道的心事的时候。。。但原来是我让你没了勇气，是我让你在这个路程中疲累了。。是我的自私和疏忽，让你觉得我对这份情意太潇洒。。其实当年你确实是我最要好的朋友。。

我知道，你会看到这个部落的。。也许当年我欠你一个解释，也或许当年你放下了，这份迟来的回复，也并不是要证明什么。。这么多年以来，我确确实实的忘了很多我们之间发生的事情，包括那封离别信。。但却没有忘过我有这么一位好朋友。。

回来古晋很多次了，但都没有找你，我希望你可以谅解。。目前，和家人在一起的每一分每一秒我都不想错过。。我希望自己在十月可以空出时间与你相遇。。。。。

messy-day

I always wanted to make my blog look matured. However, it never succeed as I'm too lazy to search one by one. Okay. Today is a mess. Almost not going to watch the movie which already-bought-the-ticket.

First, queuing like a fool to just buy popcorn and coke while I wanted to rush to the washroom so much. Waiting for Mr G putting those groceries in his car at the super far away carpark is like hell. Don't ask me why. I wonder why I'm being so impatient lately, too.

So, a small fight happened when he show up. Well, it always turns up into a big fight. It just always did. To cut it short, we managed to watch the movie after the first 30 minutes. 


Bad day perhaps. Though it's the pay day today. Maybe it's just the weather. Hmm..


Kay, going to have a midnight bathe now. Just to soothe my emotions. And will read a few pages of this long-time-no-read-book, My Lost Daughter by Nancy Taylor. Goodnight dear Mr G. <3

Random Post in May

Omg. I realized that there are lots of things that #lamaixbuat. Like, long time didn't play around with camera (ahh camera rosak! Damn!), long time didn't blog, long time x masak, long time didn't play around with my guitar, even long time dy didn't spend time looking at my own face in the mirror. Ahh. Please love yourself more, my dear!

Well, will do.  :)

sigh.\

Oh yeah, I just bought flight tickets back hometown for mother's day. #FINALLY okay. sigh. I'm broke now. Siapa-siapa pls dun ajak me jalan-jalan or makan-makan. Poket dah koyah! *CRY*

okay just for updates, this is how I look in March. I look worse now. Oh God. @__@

充电中~

明天又开始做晚班了~ 不过这次是回到BJ上班，其实有点儿无奈~ T__T 平静的晚班又一定会有起伏不定的旋律了。。 无论如何，上过了RC的两堂课后，要学习如何放手一些我们无法改变的事情，且要以另一个观点来看那件事。。所以。。。还是一句—— 加油吧！

累了。。要睡了。。可房里还有一大堆东西要收拾~ 整个月不收拾房间的残局。。。 T__T

晚安呗！

P/S: BJ - Bukit Jalil ; RC - Relationship Champion :)

你幸福吗？:)

哈哈~不知道这样说会不会有点儿夸。。刚刚在看着《步步惊心》第1集，耳边传来张学友的“我真的受伤了”，突然觉得好耳熟，很窝心，我是差点儿不认得自己的部落了！哈哈~ :)

—————

如果不是因为肚子饿，我想我都差点儿忘了现在其实已经凌晨1.30了~ 做了两天的晚班后，今天虽然是放假但现在仍然是精神饱满的。。哈哈，那为什么昨晚大概凌晨的时候却会在工作上打瞌睡呢？哈哈，该更加认真工作的。 :P

今天到cheras的giant逛逛~ 没买什么但却花了50令吉。钱如果可以花不完的话那该多好啊！哈哈~ 对了，今天买了一本书奖励奖励自己 - 《妈，亲一下》 九把刀著。每天有书陪伴，好幸福哦~ :)

前几天有位同事问了我一个问题 - “为什么你不常和朋友出来聚聚呢？吃吃饭喝喝茶啊~” 哈哈，真的有点考倒我。。:P 其实自己本身不爱说太多话，可是跟投缘的却可以说三天三夜都有说不完的话。。所以和很多人喝喝茶也并不是我一贯会去做的事~ 有人会问我在家不闷吗~ 其实，我很享受一个人在家轻轻松松的感觉。。就算我回古晋，也很享受天天缠着家人的感觉~ 从小都不爱出门，但和亲人一起出门的话就是另一回事了。。:) 这该叫什么呢？宅女吗？哈哈！其实在家不闷啊~ 可以买买菜，煮煮新食谱的菜肴，打打扫房子，洗洗这个那个的，成就感会很满足哦！不信你自己试试看咯~ 呵呵~

好咯，不聊了。:) 明天也是幸福offday之日，后天又是晚班咯~ 最近觉得工作很幸福，也很感谢上帝让我身边出现很多很多的天使、贵人，“不厌倦”而很有耐心地容忍我这个差不多可以称“弱智”的同事。。哈哈~ 父神你要眷顾他们和他们一家人并赐福于他们哦！他们都是好人~ :)

P/S: 今晚总觉得自己很幸福~ 你们也要哦！ :)

^^3 xoxo

Month of Excitement! :)

Haha. I was wondering what's the right word to start my so called 'introduction'. LOL. It has been many months since I last update my blog. Well, I would say there's a lot to update!!

First of all, I had finally changed my job! :))) Emm.. Since the middle of the month - October. Yeah right, September is time to change, and my October is the month of BEGINNING. Basically, my November is the month of LEARNING, December is the month with FAMILY. :) and January is the month of EXCITEMENT!

So currently, am working for Astro as a ummm... someone whose job is really awesome? HAHAHA. Actually, every job post in this company plays a very important role and everyone's job is just simply awesome. :) Working at a broadcasting company is always my dream (before) and right now, thanks God for all the blessings! *and thanks to one of my besties too! Without u, I'm still nobody! Chewahhhh! :)

I love where I work, I love what I do, though sometimes I had done some mistakes. Haha. I read a quote from a friend this morning which I think is really true.

"If you cry at trouble, it grows double, if you learn to laugh at trouble, it disappears like a bubble!"

Simply awesome right? :) Actually what I wanted to say is, we learn from mistakes and it help us to be smarter. :) So it is going to be the 3rd month of working here, still have another 3 months to be confirmed!

Why January is the month of excitement? 1st, I had been working at Bukit Jalil area for 2 months and this month, I'm switched to Cyberjaya. New environment again! Love it!! 2nd, I'm going back home earlier than I expected! :) Off to Kuching at 17th Jan and back to KL at 1st Feb for CNY! Weeeeeee! However, since I'm back KL a bit late, so I will miss the reunion lunch with my colleagues. :(

Ohkeh, till then guys.. :)))

xoxo

September, month of #changes

Hello guys! I missed the August, I know. Had been such a busy month! Anyway, I just cut my hair 2 weeks ago. How do I look? It takes me a lot of courage to have a fringe and YUP it did make my chubby face even chubby! LOL! However, I enjoy the changes. :)

One more updates for you to know, I am learning Hangul! Yup, going to check another item in my Year 2011 Checklist! :) I was delighted once I realized I can read "다운로드 사이트" which just pop out accidentally in the google page. Answer: "Download site". Planning to at least know how to pronounce Hangul words in 30 days - end of October. Well, I will master you one day! :)

Another changes in September, I am looking for another better job which can give me a better pay. Had been thinking a lot lately and I know I cannot give my family a better living with my current salary. No matter how hard I am trying to spend less and skip meals, I still can't do a saving. Sigh. I am hoping for a good news from XXXXX, which can definitely give me bigger amount, a better working environment, a better future. Wish me luck kay! :D

*footydeliciousnotes: August is the month of #love. My darling bought the novel PS I Love You for me and I purposely spend a month to finish it. Muacks! Thank you darling! ^^

Time to CHANGE! ;)

Ok Jingjing! It's BUSY TIME!!! Well buddies, I'm currently have lotsofstuff to-do and planning-to-do. And, right now, it's the time for me to C-H-A-N-G-E (yeah, just want to spell it right :D) my mindset, which, DON'T THINK TOO MUCH AND JUST GO FOR IT! Yeah, don't think too much on how it might be, how it will goes, how if this, how if that. And if you are one like me, let's do it together, move forward, change it if you think your life hasn't gone that far, yet.

I am now learning to be a FedEx girl. Will list down for u guys what I'm planning to do. Gtg babies! Happy FRIDAYYYYY!!! Muacks! <3

Lotsoflov3,
Jingjing ♥

Wink! ;)

TECH Cutest Baby Photo Contest

@____@

Yeap, this is how i look like after long time stay in front of my lappy. Feeling dizzy too. However, just hope that my lappy won't get sick. The brightness is max already though it looks like the button is just at the middle.

Anyway, kinda busy these few days. Hyper tension. Hyper bad memories. Cannot remember most of the stuff, lately, and it's like badly. And, I'm also facing seriously hair-dropped. Ok I don't wanna be bald. :( Still have no actions, yet but soon. After the busy session am facing right now... :S

So, straight forward as I'm little lack of extra time now..

Here's a TECH Cutest Baby Photo Contest! :)It's open to all 0-48 months old babies/toddlers. As long as you're a human, and you have a cutie kid at home, just submit his/her recent photo to contest@k-director.com. :) They welcome all people to join, no matter what races you are, no matter which nationality you are! Cool, rite? :)

For more details, please click HERE

Ohh, and.... They are giving away CASHHH + ANGRY BIRD Soft Toys up to RM530 as prizes! Are you an Angry Bird lovers? JOIN NOW! :)

Photoshop Brush Lesson #1

❥Hi there! Finally there's a second post before May ends. ; ) Recently I could hardly log in here for updates though I online all the time! T^T Okok, will update you guys more frequent k? ; )

Anyway, this morning woke up very early at 7am and was about to finishing my work. However, it turns up doodling something on my Photoshop canvas. ;P

(Click to view larger picture)
Title: "You're Not Alone..."
Artist (kononnya): jingjing
Year: 22nd May, 2011
Material: Photoshop Brush + Photoshop Gradient

Ok guys! LOL I xhebat okay. I can't draw this at Photoshop. XP All I'm using is a few of Photoshop Brush, edit a bit and using Photoshop Gradient. And btw, I'm just a beginner so don't complain lahh.. If it's nice then feel free to like this post lor! xoxo ^^,

OK, let's move forward. Please feel free to click the link below if you would like to download the brush yah! ;)

• BACKGROUND: Realistic Sky Gradient / GRADIENT: Sunrise

• GRASS: The Grasslands / BRUSH: Sample Brush #27, #28, #31, #32, #33, #34, #35

• TREE: Complete Tree Brush Pack / BRUSH: Maple7

• BIRDS: Bird Photoshop Brushes / BRUSH: Grouping1, Gourping 3, Grouping6,
  

• SUN LENS FLARE: 8 Sun Brushes / BRUSH: Sun 8

By the way, so sorry coz I forgot the source for my little girl brush. :( Actually that brush has 2 person figure. I erase a figure of a lady and keep the little girl. Then, I add a balloon on her hand as if she's looking for a hope.

So, that's it! Easy right? Now everybody can be creative as the brush are seriously AWESOME & CREATIVE! Ok I have to get back to work and you guys enjoy yourself! I'm sure you all can come out with something greater! :)❥

14th May, 2011

Broken hearted..

April ^^3

Hello bloggers! Has been a month! Yah a month I didn't update my blog. So, to pay you guys something in return, I had renew my header! T-a-d-a-a-n-g-g-g!!! How is it? Hehe. Was just thinking that there had been long time I didn't "DIY" my blog. Haha. And this is first step! :)

Anyway, it's #SATURDAY! Okay for today's plan, I should have a swim this morning. ;P Cancelled due to laziness attacking me. Then I should go to KL International Book Fair 2011 at PWTC. It's final 2 days alreday but yet I still lying on my bed and with my lappy on top of my belly? lol. Actually I was planning to go with my Mr. Polar Bear since a month ago but YAH HE HAS TO WORK TODAY! >___< Merajukkk! haha. Anyway, take it easy! Take it easy!!! ;P

Oh, will back blogging again later k? My dear polar bear is calling! :P

:: 人生中的难题 ::

最近一旦到了星期五就会很开心，
但又很害怕自己没有好好珍惜难得的周末和恐惧星期日的到来。
所以最近我的星期日都是很伤心地度过的。

我得了工作恐惧症吗？


其实，谁在工作上是没有压力和面对难题呢？
我们常常小看自己，觉得自己没有办法完成；
没有办法继续走下去；觉得前面的路太难走了。

自信究竟跑哪儿去了？


其实一生人中我们也不知不觉
面对和克服了多少所谓的那“人生中的走不下去”，
不是吗？
只是自己没有察觉，
也或许是克服了难题后就会习惯性的把一切抛开
一句“终于解决了！”就把一切忘掉。


人，就是这样。
常常忘了感恩，
忘了去细考事情到底是怎么解决的。。
是我们幸运吗？
我们又是何人，会有如此幸运的待遇？
忘了感恩，就会使我们容易面对下个“人生中的走不下去”。。


就像我现在一样。


不是时候在这儿杞人忧天吧？
是应该好好地感恩，
想想究竟上主让我”幸运“了几次，
也想想该怎么从难题里寻乐吧！


不过老实说，还真想歇会儿，
就在那既遥远又亲近的家。。。


今晚，
我想家了。。。

:: 伤口 ::

昨天早上起床时，发现手上无端端地多了个伤口。。就在手肘那里。 真讨厌。每天都会有新伤口，尤其是在手的部分。三个星期前，右手食指的皮裂开了，现在已完全复原。两个星期前，轮到右手拇指的皮裂开了。现在复原七七八八。上个星期左手的中指烫伤了，起了泡。到现在都还疼着。。


天啊~~可不可以不要受伤？
而且还是不知从哪在哪伤着的。。

----------------

昨天查到了4月的某个周末有便宜来回机票，吉隆坡及古晋。想买哦！我答应过自己，只要有了能力，就要常回家。
不想要再像之前求学时那样，一年只回一两次。。

对了，忘了跟大家禀报小女子的最新消息！我工作了！
等待已久的恩典，我会好好珍惜哦。感谢上帝！

好了，不多说了，都凌晨三点了~小女子要入睡了哦！~各位晚安！

--------------------

祝福全天下的人今天一觉醒来都会感觉到幸福！


--------------------
P/S: 我最近会较忙哦~工作了就没那么有时间上博客~呜呜！会想念你们的！

:: February new mission ::

Huhu~ Wanna off to bed dy.
3.03am now.
The roosters outside my house dah berkokok dy.
Morning or night nih? Huhu~

Anyway, am runsing bout one thing.
I got my job dy.
But now, I need a part time job for weekend.
Anyone got any good idea or recommend?
:(
Don't kedekut la~ :) Share with me ma. Hehe.

Need more money to make my family a better living.
This is now my "this-month-new-mission" :)
Won't give up.




Uols too! Don't give up. ❤



[p/s] Hehe~ Yah, I owe uols one recipe. Okay2. 3 recipes I know. :) Okay, 2mrw I update!!

:: 8 gone, 7 left ::

Happy Chinese New Year!! :))
Hehe. Baru day 9. 6 days more to enjoy! ^^

Wanna off to bed now. Yawn..
Hehe. K, tomorrow I'll share some recipe! :P
Visit me again here tomorrow yah! :))


Muacks♥!! Nanite, my Mr. Polar Bear. ♥

:: Back to where I belong to =) ::

Hi! Happy Thursday! ^^
Time flies. A month time spending with family now only left 8 days..


CNY is going to end soon too. Another 7 days. :(
Ngek. Dun wan it to end so soon can or not?
Or, make the clock tick slower, perhaps? :(

The moment I appreciate the most throughout this holiday
is when I'm spending my time with my family.
Know what, I was shocked when my mum told me last week
that she realized that I had changed.
No longer that bad-tempered,
but matured.
Haha. Mum, I've grown up. No longer 18 or 20.
But 23 and 3 months now.
Well, 25 according to Lunar Calendar.


Wrinkles are starting to say hi to me.


Well, it also means that you're no longer 36.
I remember your age at 36 clearly.
Coz once I asked your age when we are at our old house,
in the kitchen.
And you answered 36.
Which is also the year my brother came to the world,
came to our family.

36 is gone. 46 is where you are now.
12 years. You're still looking young,
just like 12 years before.
But you're no longer as healthy as before.
Kinda worried, is thinking of canceling my dream looking for
an independent life in other land.

I've to re-plan. 1 year maybe.
After 1 year, perhaps it's time to look after my family.
Sister might be studying uni at that time.
Brother is going to sec school.
Teen. No longer a child.
I know, you can't handle it yourself.
I'll coming back and give you a hand,
I promise.

Just, maybe it's not easy to leave someone.
God, lead my way, please?
I need your wisdom,
I need your guidance.
Light my path,
lead my way...

Say hi to my grandma.
It's last Sunday. My mum, sister and I went to our kebun in my hometown,
Tondong, Bau.
Actually my sis and I are the one who follow my mum and my grandma.
Want to know what we had done?


Bet you won't believe it.
With selipar jepun, track suit (belongs to my Form3 cousin),
I petik lada aka black pepper that you guys used to eat.
Haha. Sorry no photo during we all petik lada.
Not really a right time to have a photoshot session.
Unless you want to fall. Haha.
Spend like 2 hours petik lada,
then we went back (to my hometown house, Bau)
Honestly,
it feels good.


My grandma. Very sihat. 60 plus, almost 70.
Still working, still love kerja kebun,
still love cooking.
Eh nope, I love her cooking!

My uncle. Single and available.
Bila you mau kahwin, uncle?
Haha. I want more cousin leh!

Introduce you all to my mum. :)
She's 46. Yes, she is. :)

Mummy, I love you~

Mummy, I love you in this picture.
Will be my best picture of the year.
Love your laughter,
it makes me remembers your laughter forever.

I really hope of coming back very soon.
I miss here already.
Miss my family.
I want to back to where I belong to.
My hometown,
my family,
my mum...

:: When ur ex engaged ::

If you shivered once you saw your ex's current engagement photo,
what does that means?




Dar, hug me tight. Tell me that the one I love is you...

5/2 = Moody

Hi! Sorry I've been away for so long and left this blog not updated. Well anyway, firstly let me greet every Chinese in every corner of the world, HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR! Wish everyone and your loved ones good health and great wealth in the Year of the Golden Rabbit! :)

For your information, I'm currently in Kuching my hometown! Back here on 21st Jan and will stay here till 18th Feb. Know why? :)) Well, sorry for not updating my latest status here. Hehe. I'm finally employed! :))) Finally I got my job! First mission in this new year of 2011 is achieved! Thanks to everyone who had always been around me during my hard times. :) Especially to my Mr. Polar Bear, Farin, Kechik, my Technical gang, Leesan, SuetNie and lots lots more! They have been very caring when I'm jobless... Thanks agaiN! :)

My company will be Pelangi Publishing. Yes, the reference books that we are all very familiar with during our shcool time! :) It's located at Bangi. So it's kinda near. No need to wait for train and all. Take bus je. (But still dunno the bas route is how. hahaha! ) Anyway, my job is basically Online Marketing Executive, which is another job post than what I applied for. They offer me this job and I take it as a gift and plan from God. I believed there's a reason for this planning and I will work for a good future with this given opportunity.


However, I'm not really in a good mood today. Just got to know that, my ex. Ehem. Yes, my ex. He is getting engaged today! A bit down. Dunno what to say. So, hope today nobody come to my house. I really no interest in anything right now. Mr. Polar Bear, sorry. Don't mean to hurt you. Actually you don't need to care what I said, you just need to come to me and ignore all my bullshit. But I know you have your limit for you patience, too. So I would rather keep myself in silence now. Hope you would come to me soon. Please?

Got to arrange my emotions a bit.... Bye.